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If Cruise Lines Were Women I’ve Dated - Cunard, Virgin Voyages, P&O, MSC & More

Tom Cruisetube
Tom Cruisetube
🥈Expert
👁️ 421 views📅 9 months ago⏱️ 10:08
What This Creator Said
Creator Had Mixed FeelingsShip Comparison🥈Expert Creator
Veteran Cruiser

Source: Our analysis of the creator's lived experience, based on what they said in this video.

Creator's Key Takeaways

There's someone out there for everyone and there's a ship that's right for you.

Every time I walk away from a Kunard ship, I have that sickening feeling inside.

Some ships come and go. Some ships stay with you forever.

It is worth paying double for a solo cabin.

Creator's Tips & Advice

Learn from my mistakes and pick the right cruise line early.
It is worth paying double for a solo cabin.

Questions This Creator Answers

QWhat would happen if cruise lines were women I've dated?

Topics Covered

Entertainment Activities2 Happy BaconKids Family1½ Happy BaconDining Bars Drinks4½ Sad BaconItinerary Route1½ Happy BaconCabin Balcony1 Happy BaconEntertainment Nightlife2 Sad BaconService Crew1½ Sad Bacon
How to read the Trip Bacon Score
Happy Bacon — creators loved this aspect
Sad Bacon — creators took issue with this
Meh — no strong opinion either way

Scale: 0–5 strips in half-step increments. 0 = “meh”, 5 = “bacon bliss”. Aggregated from creator-review sentiment, weighted by channel expertise.

About our Bacon Score methodology
YouTube Video Description

There’s a ship for everyone — just like there’s someone for everyone. The trick is finding the right one before you get seasick, heartbroken, or stuck at sea with someone who thinks 'unique' means just like everyone else. In this 100% honest (and slightly too personal) video, I reveal what would happen if cruise lines were women I’ve dated — or nearly dated… or got tangled up with in a deeply confusing international perfume-counter incident. From Keira, I mean Kara (MSC) — that sparkle ain't a diamond — to Woman X (Titanic), this is a tour through cruise lines and my own life, and let’s just say not all of it went to plan. 🛳️ Featuring: 00:00 - Intro 00:16 - MSC Cruises – Meet Kiera (Chaos, Cocktails & Selfies) 01:27 - Cunard – Victoria (Elegance You Can’t Afford) 02:27 - Royal Caribbean – Molly (Fun Until You Need Depth) 02:55 - Disney Cruise Line – Linzi Classic (Sugar & Sunshine) 03:54 - P&O Cruises – Emma (Deserves Better) 04:34 - Celebrity Cruises – Krystle (Beautiful but...) 05:28 - Virgin Voyages – New Linzi (Tattoos & Turkey Teeth) 06:24 - Princess Cruises – Caroline (Your Forever Cruise Wife (Not Mine)) 07:15 - Carnival Cruise Line – Tania (Regret in Tequila Form) 07:59 - Holland America – Jacqueline (Cool, Cold & Classy) 08:54 - Titanic – Mystery Celebrity (Because… Why Not?) Why am I sharing all this? Because cruising is like dating — it’s better when you know what you’re getting into. And because YouTube is cheaper than therapy. 💬 Which cruise line is YOUR ex? Let me know in the comments… unless it’s Disney, in which case stay of Insta. 👍 Like. Subscribe. Tap the bell. And remember — heroes book the solo cabin. #CruiseTube #MSC #Cunard #RoyalCaribbean #CelebrityCruises #CarnivalCruise #VirginVoyages #PrincessCruises #Pando #HollandAmerica #Titanic #DatingDisasters #cruisereview To preserve peoples anonymity some AI is used, but every word is 100% real and true!